Happy Friday.

This makes me think of how well my sister and I behaved (and still behave) together. It's an I-love-you-but-your-pain-is-hilarious clip.

Is it weird that Kelly and I would always say, "Dad and Mom are the King and Queen, I am the princess and you are bag of poop" to each other? Or maybe the weird part is that it would really hurt our feelings when we weren't the princess and were, instead, a bag of poop?

Whenever Kelly was trying to apologize for something, she would switch it around so that she was the bag of poop and I was the princess. We would make up immediately when I regained my proper title.

I mean...SERIOUSLY

Ok, let's get one thing straight. Universal healthcare is nothing short of a universal nightmare. Yes, it sounds good, but in actuality, it is really, really, really bad.

It is a total shocker that I'm not going to be PC and say it might or it may or it will but rather that it won't. It won't work. Period. The whole idea sucks and let me explain to you why. Here are the top reasons Universal Nightmare Healthcare sucks:

• Access to medical care will not improve, it will actually get worse. Hopefully you will never be told that you have cancer, but if you do, do you really want to be put on a waiting list for SEVERAL MONTHS (or longer) until it is your turn? Please read this article.
  
• It is hardly "free" since we would be paying for it with higher taxes. Plus, oftentimes the copay amounts are 10-40% of the procedure costs. IT'S NOT FREE, PEOPLE! It's actually MORE EXPENSIVE!
  
• Medicines are not more readily available or less expensive. Innovation and new product development would actually be stymied under this type of program. When is the last time you heard about a new, breakthrough technology being developed in Canada? Uh...yeah. That's what I thought.
  
• While I am sure that there are nice people in Washington...somewhere...I do not like them enough to let them make MY medical decisions. Or decisions for my family. Seriously, do you really want the same people running the DMV to be in charge of your healthcare?
  
• While our current healthcare system has room for improvement, it's not nearly as bad as the government suggests.
  
• There are way more reasons NOT to do this than reasons to do it. Want to read an unbiased review of the pros and cons? Be my guest.

If you care about yourself, your family, your friends, AND have at least two brain cells, I am sure that you are in agreement with me on this topic. Just say NO to a universal healthcare disaster.

The alarm goes: Beep, beep, beep

For all of those of you out there that were planning to break into our house, well, you've missed your chance. We had an alarm system installed on Friday afternoon.

Along with our alarm system comes a lot of beeping noises. Echo has a little tendancy (or BIG tendancy) to be slightly (or completely) neurotic about beeping noises. Our house is a lot of fun right now because any time that a door opens, the alarm beeps, and Echo freaks.

So, being the wonderful pet owner that I am, I am trying to figure out what to do to help her to calm down. The first natural step was to google my question.

I thought that I'd share some of the funny responses to this question that I found online.

Here are a few of the best ones (verbatim):

• Sometimes they cannot - not be scared. The only thing that may be able to help him is some anti-anxiety pills from a vet. With the anti-anxiety you have to catch the dog before it starts to storm or it wont work. So if it looks like its going to storm give him a pill or correct dosage given so that it's in his system before hes stressed out. Goodluck. My lab is petrified of the vaccuum, spoons, cups and strollers.
• The condition that is causing this behavior to manifest is genetic, it is a temperament disorder called weak nerves and there is nothing you can do about it. The dog will always be this way. Hope I helped!
• Just be completely calm and he will pick up on it and follow suite.
• My little Yorkie, Delilah, is fearless except for the sound of bubble gum popping. The sound causes her to leave the room and hide.
• If your dog is nervous or barking at the beeping noise from your smoke detector, it might be because he is afraid that the battery life is low and it needs to be replaced.

DUHHH. Why didn't I think of that? Maybe if I chew bubble gum, tell her not to worry because we have batteries in our smoke alarm or show her some cups and spoons she'll be distracted from the beeping noise. Compared to the the stories above, Echo may be more normal than I previously thought...

An Oldie but a Goodie

Inspired by the Olympics and the speed of Yusain Bolt, I felt compelled to look up some of MY past accomplishments. Not only was I a high school track star, but also a kick a$% softball player. And a really good cross county runner, too. An article was published (no kidding) in the Columbia Missourian comparing me to Deon Sanders. The more that I think about that comparison, the more that I realize the similarities between the two of us are endless. Unfortunately I couldn't find that article online - but I do have it framed at home. I swear.

Anyway, this is all that I could really find online. I read it outloud to Dennis and this was his response:

"You played 3rd base? Did you actually throw anyone out?"

"Yes, Dennis I am really good. And fast."

"Maybe in 1996."

Man, I feel old. I guess there is a slight chance that I was a little bit faster TWELVE YEARS AGO.

Two and a Half (creepy?) Men

Does anyone else find the last 5 seconds of this theme song to be creepy? It kind-of ruins the whole thing. I guess that assumes that it is good to begin with...

With the plethora of great TV shows airing these days, Dennis and I have been reduced to watching shows like this. Awesome.

Like a Good Neighbor...

This weekend was so much fun! I learned to cook on Friday night and we went to a wedding on Saturday night in Dahlonega, GA at a winery. I know, going to a wedding isn't always a lot of fun, but this one really was a good time. Laura and Mark, two of our neighbors, had a beautiful and very personal wedding ceremony. Jason, Tina, Danielle, Khan, Trish, Dennis and I all drove to the wedding and spent the entire night laughing, entertaining ourselves, and enjoying the delicious wine (we came home with a case of 'Plentitude'.)

It is very interesting how you make new friends throughout your life and as you go through different phases. There is the high school phase, the college phase, the we-have-a-serious-significant-other phase, the getting married phase, the kid phase, and so many more phases that we have yet to experience. The good friends are the multi-phasers. They are here for the long haul. ANYWAY, the point that I'm trying to make is that we're now in the we-have-great-neighbors phase.

After living in our house almost three years, we have made some amazing friends that live just seconds (literally) away. I know that my co-workers often laugh or roll their eyes when they ask what Dennis and I are doing for the weekend because it almost always goes something like this: "we're doing (insert activity here) with the neighbors..." I don't think that they believe me and may actually think that I'm making it up to avoid doing something with them. (Nahh...I would never do something like that!) They just don't understand that we have a lot of awesome neighbors (including ourselves, of course!) that we really enjoying hanging out with.

(Oh, and BTW, I am going to grow my hair long again so that I don't get any more MLR look-alike comments. Or Webster look-alike comments.)

Where's the beef?

Josh saw my earlier post about how I need to learn to cook and he came up with a great idea. He suggested that Maya could probably teach me a thing or two (she is a Rachel Ray protege) and we could have fun at the same time. So, Maya picked out a recipe that looked fabulous and the planning began. I must admit, though, the rating of an "Intermediate" level of difficulty did make me a nervous. I started to think that she had more faith in me than was warranted.

In any event, Maya sent Josh to the grocery store and I picked up the stuff for a salad, garlic bread, and lots-o wine.

Around 7pm the cooking began. Maya made everything look so easy! I thanked her for bringing the chives and she laughed and said that they were actually parsley leaves, but I was welcome.

Half way through the preparations, Maya started rummaging through the grocery bags. "Where's the beef? Josh, you bought beef, right?"

"Yes, I mean, I thought that I did. Going to Publix right now." He was out the door and back within a few minutes and the festivities in the kitchen continued, uninterrupted.

Judging by the small amount of food that was left over, I think that it is fair to say that our cooking adventure was a success! I enjoyed it and I don't typically like Italian food!

Dennis was very impressed that the delicious food came out of the kitchen in our house. Now that I know how to cook (this recipe), Dennis is in store for a lot of Beef & Cheese Manicotti nights.

Maya - thanks for the cooking lesson!

Dave, Josh, Justin and Dennis - thanks for being the guinea pigs!

Cake & Icing Take on a New Meaning...

Please check out this link.

In honor of stupid people everywhere, let's have some cake and LOTS of icing. For some reason, Travis Tritt's song, Here is your sign, comes to mind...

Katie, thanks for sharing.

Pillow Case Bleach

The mystery of the seemingly self-bleaching pillow case has finally been solved.

I have been telling Dennis that his face leaks bleach because that is the only reasonable explaination for why his pillow case gets these weird bleach spots on it when my pillow case stays the same color. I wash them at the same time and I am not secretly bleaching his pillow case and leaving mine alone. It's a mysterious phenomenon. Well, now it's just a phenomenon. No more mystery.

Today Dennis mentioned that he has been drooling in his sleep a lot lately. When he said that, it was one of those moments where time just stands still. He looked at me and our eyes locked as we both had the same exact thought at the exact same time: his face isn't leaking bleach after all - - his saliva must have bleach in it!

After googling 'drool in sleep', I learned that drooling in your sleep is a disorder. Yes, it's a disorder. This is serious. While I read that medications are available for this ailment, it is often remedied by changing your sleep position or being sure to brush and gargle before bed.

Ah...now we're getting somewhere.

Look-alike or not look-alike?

I don't know if it's just the excitement that everyone seems to have for the Olympics or the excitement caused by the amazing things that those Olympic gymnasts can do with their bodies, but I have had NO LESS than 10 different people tell me that I look like Mary Lou Retton. I am not sure if it's a compliment or not.

I guess I need to stop doing a cartwheel and back flip every time I enter a room to clear up the confusion.

Sponge Bob Square Pants

So, I decided to do a little sponge painting this weekend. I know what you are thinking: Sponge painting is so 1990. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, I don't know. The yellow walls in our bathroom were just too yellow so I really had no choice but to take some drastic measures and sponge paint.

After watching a 3 minute video on youtube, I was off to Home Depot to get the supplies. A few hours later, just about everything in the bathroom had blue tape on it and we were ready to rock. Echo sat outside the bathroom, put her paws over her eyes, and hoped for the best.

Dennis came home and stood by Echo, looking at what I had done to the bathroom walls.

"What do you think?" I asked, not really wanting to hear the answer.

"It looks pretty good. I mean, you can't really tell that anything is different. Maybe when it dries it'll be more noticeable." I thought the same thing but was hoping that I was wrong and just being too hard on myself. Nope, the truth was that I had spent money, time, and a lot of effort to make the bathroom look....the same. FAN-tastic.

"It doesn't look worse, does it?" Wow, I was really shooting for the stars.

"No, it just looks the same. It looks good," he said, grinning. "I love you."

"I love you, too. I hate sponge painting, though. Sponge painting sucks."

Now that the walls have dried, you can tell that they were sponge painted. You just have to stand about 2 feet from the wall. Or, maybe a little closer than that.

In a final, last ditch effort to mute the brightness of the walls, I switched the light bulbs. Wow. That made a lot of difference. I guess I should've tried that first.

A Pregnant Pause

So, it's been a while (three or four weeks?) since I've given an update on what's going on with this whole baby-making-thing. I know that y'all are laying awake at night wondering when, just when, will I post some type of update for you to read. Well, wait no longer. The moment is here.

As mentioned in a previous post, I had to wait for my pregnancy tests to come back with a big fat goose egg for me to start moving the process forward again. Well, ladies and gents, I finally got to zero and so now we are able to start getting my body all revved up for the next attempt.

The pharmacy fairy showed up at our house a few days ago with some of the meds that I'll be taking over the next few weeks and months. I think the next shipment may require more than one fairy since it (is a fairy a "he" or a "she"? I always assumed it was a "she", so we'll go with that) will be bringing me many more meds. Maybe the stork could do the delivery since he is much bigger.

ANYWAY, we are just starting to get my body ready for the next IVF round (which will probably occur in a few months) and it is amazing to me how much goes into the process. Someone did a lot of work to figure this all out! And I thought that getting pregnant would be easy!! It seemed simple: you just get the eggs, get the sperm, put them together in a petri dish, turn out the lights and put on some romantic music, and viola! you have some embryos. A few days later, the embroys are implanted. Then, if it doesn't work, you try again in a few weeks. I had no idea that it would take several months to even consider doing it again.

We have two great nurses that allow me to call them all the time to ask questions on "how" and "what if" and "when" which makes this process so much easier. They laugh at me because I have this little tendancy to be ... uh ... meticulous ... and ... uh ... well, let's just say it: anal. I called one nurse this morning to confirm that I am supposed to be giving myself shots in my lower abdomen now, not in my back. She patiently answered and gave me a play-by-play of what to do, when to do it, and when to call her again. She keeps me organized, which I never thought that I would need. But, I do. Heck, I can't even pronounce the names of most of the meds that I'm taking.

So, there you have it... not pregnant ... still working on it... stay tuned for more updates.

MIZZOU-RAH

I will get into football this season, I will get into football this season, I will get into football this season...

To Wii or Not to Wii

After this weekend, our lives will never be the same again. On Saturday morning, Dennis decided that wii need a Wii. If wii didn't get one, wii would surely die (and yes, this post will be filled with "wii" whenever I can sneak it in). Since it was imperative to our survival, he would stop at nothing to find one. Best Buy, GameStop, Wal-Mart, Target, and Costco were a few of his unsuccessful stops. He came home without a Wii in hand, head down, and plopped on the couch. Ninetendo has done a helluva job marketing this product because with only a few in stores, the game starts the moment that you decide to purchase a Wii.

It was a challenge that Dennis had accepted...and failed.

But, he was far from giving up.

He decided to try one more GameStop that was near our house. I have never seen a bigger smile on his face than I did when he returned from that trip. The hefty price tag of $250 didn't matter because Dennis won. He found it.

After setting it up, wii decided to have a marga-wii-ta and try a few of the games. Being my skeptical self, I didn't think that I'd be a fan of this new toy. But, as soon as I set up my "Mii", I was hooked. I was impressed by my ability to make "Kmart" look just like me. And, apparently, I'm a very good bowler.

Wii were quickly engrossed in a serious game of bowling. Echo was thoroughly confused because wii were moving and doing the throwing motion - but nothing was coming out of our hands. She gave up after a while, sighed, and layed down next to us.

After a few games, our neighbors called and wii went with them to grab some drinks, eat some pizza, and grab s'more drinks. They went tubing all day so they were way ahead of us drink-wise so Dennis and I did our best to catch up. While they were telling the funny stories from the day, wii saw our chance and made up for lost time very quickly.

Mike and Melissa, who live down the street from us, have an awesome bar in their basement, so their house was the natural choice after wii left Blue Moon Pizza. It didn't take very long for Dennis to suggest that everyone come to our house for a Wii good time. The boys quickly jumped into a game of bowling and the girls went out on our patio to catch up s'more.

Around 1:00 or 1:30am the crowd start to thin out. The boys were still oblivious to anything going on around them. Being the Betty Crocker that I am, I made some brownies (from a box, of course) for them and headed up to bed. I think Dennis got in bed next to me around 3am.

When wii have too much fun the night before, wii say that wii are "sick" or "have the flu" because it makes us feel more responsible. Or, maybe just a little bit less irresponsible. In any event, wii drank a lot of fluids, slept a lot, and our flu symptoms seemed to be dissipating. That's a good thing because apparently Dennis had another mission for the day. Wii had to get Mario Kart. Luckily, after going to numerous stores and just when he was about to admit defeat, he found one. Yess - wii win! Wii get to spend another $50!

Ok, time to stop blogging. Dennis just got the steering wheels out of the package and I need to show him how the pros play Mario Kart.