Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Surrounded By Vaginas

I'm in my OB's office this morning.  As I wait, and look around at the glorious surroundings, I notice one thing:  I am surrounded by vaginas.  Sectional views, schematic sectional views, external, internal, you name it and it's here.  Over the years, I've become accustomed to this but I can't help but remember how uncomfortable Dennis looked when he entered the OB office with me for this first time several years ago.  He smiled at me, sweetly, and looked incredibly uneasy when his eyes strayed anywhere but the sink, me, or the magazines placed so neatly beside him. 

Feeling exhausted at my almost-28 week-checkup, I plopped on the exam table a few minutes ago and then noticed a very uplifting (if you can call it that) poster.  The poster has pictures of different mammals and their gestation periods. 

As you are well aware, the human gestation period is approximately 260 days.  Ten months, 40 weeks, a very long time.  Apparently size plays a large role in determining the gestation period of all mammals.  So, I'm not so excited to see that cow's have a very similar gestation period to humans with theirs lasting 280-290 days.  I do often feel like a cow being pregnant in this summer heat ... but that's a topic for another post. 

Elephants are pregnant for almost 2 years!  Six-hundred and sixteen days is the average gestation period for that very unfortunately mammal.  I hope the female elephants tell their male counterparts that this is a one-time deal.  Two years is an insane amount of time to be with child.  And here are several words that I never thought would come out of my mouth:  I wish that I was a hamster.  They are only pregnant for 15-18 days.  Can you imagine?  That would be awesome.  But then, after you have the baby hamsters it might not be so great because then you'd just be back to being only a hamster.  And I don't think that I'd do well in a cage.  And hamster food has never appealed to me. 

So, anyway, these are my random thoughts.  I guess that's what happens to you when you are surrounded with medical textbook type photos and views of vaginas.  And lots of them.  Probably at least 10 in the patient room that I am sitting in right now.  I've become immune to the strangeness of it all and I'm starting to get a little wacky...

1 comment:

Katie said...

2 years, yikes!!!! My OB does not have vagina pictures up. Should I be worried or happy????? Oh and don't hampster moms sometimes eat their babies? Something to think about!