Thursday, August 20, 2009

Ready or Knot

When I think about leaving Connor with the nanny and going off to work, I get a knot in my stomach that won't go away. So, as you can imagine, next Tuesday is looming over my head. It's like seeing that bird, ready to poop on you, and you are forced to just keeping marching towards it... knowing exactly what is going to happen when you are underneath it. Naah, I'd say that it is worse than that.

Over the last few weeks, I have tried so hard to NOT think about it and to really focus on just enjoying my time with this LBB (Little Booger Butt). I have to keep reminding myself that it's not like I am going away to war or that I'll never see my son again. But it sure feels like it.

Maybe one of my customers will be able to help me out next week and do whatever medical procedure is necessary to remove the knot. I am sure that there is some type of cure out there. I mean, there has to be...right?

1 comment:

Katie said...

:( Hearing you talk about it beings back sooooo many memories. It was SO hard leaving Cooper (at 6 weeks) but it did get a bit easier and I called a TON. Something that made the first two days a lot easier on me was having Phil take off work and spend those days with Cooper. I cried but knew he was safe with daddy. This let me get back into the routine before BOTH of us had to get into the routine. Then day 3, we did it together, Cooper and I. You may want to talk Dennis into this. ;) Also, I talked to people who understood. You will be sad and you will cry and it helps to call someone who did this who can say "yes, Krista, this sucks! BAD! I am so sorry and completely understand and am here for you." Call me babe. This is different for every woman. Some handle it just fine, some are dying to go back, some struggle the first week and some struggle forever. It is the unknown that is part of that knot, I would imagine. You will be fine and I PROMISE Connor will be fine. I worked from the time Cooper was 6 weeks to 5 1/2 months old and does he remember me dropping him at the nanny's, NOPE! ;) Love ya. BIG HUGS!!!!!! Hope I did not just make you sadder. :(