Thursday, March 12, 2009

Ch-ch-change...

Change is about as much fun as getting punched in the face. It's exciting, overwhelming, and scary all at the same time. I've never been much of a fan of it. But, whether I like it or not, I have realized one thing: no matter how much screaming and kicking I do, it's going to happen anyway.

It might have even happened to someone you know.

Last weekend, I went home for my first baby shower (I guess I should say Connor's first shower). It was a lot of fun to see my family and friends in Missouri. But this whole change thing really sunk in when I saw the balloons. It was really weird. I looked at the balloons and thought, "oh my God. We're going to have a baby boy. In a few months, it'll no longer be just Dennis, Echo and me. We're going to have a baby boy."

Judging by my ever-expanding mid (and upper...and lower) section, most people would probably guess that I was already aware of this fact. Apparently I wasn't.

Several things led to my loss of sanity at that particular moment (and it doesn't take much these days): we're now in the third (and FINAL) trimester; I have washed, folded, and put away some of the smallest clothing known to man; and we've talked with a nearby Day Care about how friggin' expensive it will be ($250/week!).

I am so excited to meet Connor but I am so scared at the same time. I love how things are with Dennis and I do not want to lose that. I don't know how to be a good mom - and I haven't even stayed at a Holiday Inn Express lately. I love the freedom of being able to run a quick errand without any problems... Will all of that change?

I think that I am just terrified of losing some of the great things about our life and being completely unprepared about how to raise the newest addition to our family. I mean, he'll be completely dependent on us! And we have less than 80 days!

My Mom, ME!, and Mommo in the middle of the street

Abby, my 5-year-old cousin

Delicious cookie favors

Echo checked out all of the goodies after I got home

6 comments:

Dennis said...

You are going to be the best mom ever.just think of all the stupid people that have babies and are doing just fine. we'll be fine. I love you

bam said...

I am so glad you had a good time in Missouri, and I love the pictures. Abby looks alot like you. Things will definitely be different with Connor's arrival, but you are so good and just remember that babies are very adaptable. Don't let Connor run your life. Love

Emmy said...

I am not going to lie adjusting will be difficult. However it does get easier as time goes on and eventually you realize, "Hey I can do this!"

Melissa said...

Glad you're having these thoughts now and can cherish the last of your "Dennis and me alone" time... I didn't have the 'freakout' until after the baby came!! Still, it does get easier and getting back to a quick trip up to Target will come. Oh - and you'll still have a wonderful marriage with Dennis since you have one now - usually, what you start with is the same as what you end with.

Katie said...

You will be amazing parents!!!!! IT will all come naturally once you see that sweet face. I promise. And when you have questions, I am just a phone call away (not that I will know but I have raised two). We love ya.

Meimi said...

We think those same thoughts, too, and we are not even pregnant yet! Mostly we think "How can a baby be cuter than a cute furry animal?" or "I slept until 10 this morning because I felt like it" but I have heard from like, every parent I know that it all changes once you see that precious little baby - that is is the hardest but most rewarding thing you will ever do. You guys will be great!