Monday, September 13, 2010

The Waiting Game

It’s this weird, hard-to-describe uneasiness. For better or for worse, I will not have any question about the outcome after tomorrow. The uneasiness will give way to change. At least the change will be definite, though. None of this worry that it may be this way or it may be the other way.

After I get that phone call, I will at least know what is going on. And how to proceed. Until then, it’s almost as if I’m in this in-between place. Its a strange, weird, and unstable place. I'm not really motivated but not unmotivated, either.

I am supposed to get a voicemail today indicating a specific time for tomorrow (Tuesday) when I need to be sitting by my phone to find out if my position has been eliminated. The company announced several months ago that layoffs would take place “this Fall”. And now, we’re here. My boss has given me little reason to be worried, pointing to my recent promotion and strong sales performance. But, there is always that chance. No matter how small it is, there is that chance that I will no longer have a job after tomorrow.

I go back and forth about whether or not I think that it is beneficial to know in advance of the layoffs. Since the announcement, motivation for the majority of the sales reps has been lack-luster at best. That’s negative for the company’s desired sales results and negative for the few motivated sales reps that are still out there. Most everyone in the sales force has at least updated their resume, posted it on the appropriate websites, and let friends and family members know that they are interested in learning about any new opportunities that they hear about. Others have taken new jobs or at least started interviewing with other employers. That’s the good thing about advance notice: those with the desire to work elsewhere take this opportunity to do so.

So, today I learn what time this particular uneasiness will end. Even when I find out that I keep my job (being positive here!), it’ll be sad and hard because some of my friends and co-workers may not be as fortunate. We will potentially be aligned to different managers, will definitely have a new territory, will not have counterparts in our new geography, and there will be new customers to learn and friends to help find new jobs. So, today things are the same. Tomorrow they will be very different.

Please keep your fingers crossed for me. Maybe cross your toes, too.


Kristi Gilbert said...

Good luck Krista! Thinking of you!

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